Facebook Etiquette

What is appropriate to discuss at the dinner table?  The answer to this question may vary depending on the company you're keeping or if you are intoxicated, but most people will still answer this question by saying "Don't discuss religion or politics."  Why is this?  What is so bad about religion or politics?  It seems everyone has an opinion on them.  It seems like an easy conversation to start, right?   Yes, but the conversation can quickly degrade to an argument that goes nowhere.  You might say to yourself "But I am ok with disagreements. I can keep the discussion civilized" No, you cannot.  A conversation is a two way street, and even if you are just stating opinions with no intent to harm, the other individual could feel attacked and switch to argument mode. Most people don't mind if you challenge a philosophy they espouse, but if you challenge their politics and they use their political affiliations as a means to define themselves, then you're posing not an intellectual argument, but a threat to their very sense of being.  In the same way I would tell others "I am Aaron", I would also say "I am a Republican."  Aaron becomes part of me when I say that.  I can say I like brownies without the same connection.  If I talk about brownies at dinner and someone tell me brownies are stupid, It doesn't make me feel bad, I just think the person talking is missing out. But if someone tells me the name Aaron is stupid, that is the same as calling me stupid, and the individual talking will probably have a glass of water dumped on their head before the night is through.  Pretty much the only safe conversation to have on these topics starts and ends with a statement of affiliation.  No one can argue with that.

With the presidential race in the spotlight, it seems like the topic of politics is coming up more and more in our lives.  One of the places I see it discussed the most is Facebook.  People post links to articles, videos, react to things candidates say etc.  Most of these posts seem harmless until you expand the comments section and witness a few Democrats and Republicans going at it.  Occasionally the steadfast Libertarian will join the mix and say "You're both dumb-Go Ron Paul"  Reading  these fire fights makes me sick inside.  I am beginning to think that Facebook needs to be more like the dinner table, and there needs to be an unspoken rule of no politics or religion.

Well, I don't completely agree with never posting anything with political or religious implications, but I think there needs to be more acute awareness of those on your massive friends list that may disagree with what you say.  I think, for example, posting a link to an LDS speakers talk on helping others with the comments "Helping people is so much fun" is acceptable.  But if the same video was posted with the comments "Helping people is so much fun, too bad Muslims don't help people" I would deem it unacceptable. A similar example is posting a link to a Romney campaign video and commenting " I like how he explains things" as opposed to "Everyone who votes for Obama is dumb."  I have actually seen the latter.  The comments broke into an argument between two of my friends that made me nauseous.  I think as long as we are careful to simply state our beliefs while not trampling on those of others, we can help prevent Facebook mudslinging.  I say help prevent because there is never a guarantee.  Someone passionate enough could turn any innocent minded post into a garbage fest.  But you should not give anyone the green light to by being inconsiderate.  

I wish there was the option to post something and then block comments.  That way no matter how many angry bored people there are in your friends list, they still wouldn't be able to hijack your post and turn it into an O'Rilley Obermann duel.

Maybe my view is too idealistic.  Maybe some people like the conflict.  But I would like to imagine that most people are decent human beings who want to be nice to others regardless of their opinions.  I would hope that the goal of posting something political or religious is not to instigate a cock fight, but rather to open peoples minds.  No one's mind will be opened let alone changed by name calling and mud slinging.  But if you give someone the opportunity to read or view something that would give them information they didn't previously have access to, that can open their mind and maybe, just maybe, they will choose on their own to agree with you.  If we really believe in our causes, isn't that what we truly want?